The fate of the world and the future of the human race is at stake as a ragtag group of unlikely heroes band together to battle the forces of evil. Sound familiar? It is, but for a while the premise and execution are campy enough to be entertaining; an encounter with the Ice-Cream Man will probably end up in the running as one of the most awesomely cheesy scenes of the year.
The problem comes in the second act, when it appears that nobody knows what to do. The action and the cheap special-effects stop, and Paul Bettany shows up as a renegade angel and explains the situation: Charlie is pregnant, God has sent some mean angels to kill the baby because he is pissed off at mankind. Bettany is here to prevent this, because he understands that God doesn't really want this--Holy shit, is it as boring to read as it is to write? Flashbacks, philosophizing, and life lessons follow in a series of expository sequences in a film that essentially has no real story to tell, which culminate in one curiously anti-climactic end-all battle between Bettany's good angel, and some other angel whose name I didn't care to remember.
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